Saturday, February 20, 2010

In Search of the Lair of Kong Fang! Where Heroes Dare!!!

So we got together tonight to playtest Doctor Merkury's Where Heroes Dare!(available from Iron Ivan Games and fine game retailers everywhere) scenario for Cold Wars in a couple of weeks. This was actually the middle of 3 scenarios the good doctor will be running and allowed us to break in the Great Wall of China table he built. This scenario set heroes trying to uncover the entrance to Kong Fang's underground lair against the villians trying to keep the heroes out. Be warned that most of the pictures I have, concern only what was happening on my side of the table and this battle report will be told through a very selfishly skewed lens :o) The Heroes side of the table: Two Teams of American Rocket Troopers and a team of elite characters.

The Elite Heroes maneuvering towards the Great Wall. Our Heroes: The Shadow, Professor Frankenbeans, and Lobster Johnson

A Red Rocket squad led by Sgt. Swift Advances

Kong Fang and his loyal Fu-Dog move safely behind the cover of their animated statue.....OF DOOM

Lobster Johnson stares blankly at a DARE! location as if to say "I'm really more of a 'killin' stuff' kind of guy, not so much a 'figurin' out stuff kind of guy"(that was Doctor Merkury's not mine). Meanwhile mere feet away the Shadow learns that, no matter how badass his crimson scarf looks, pistols just have very little effect on a giant animated bronze statue......OF DOOOOOOM

The villians manage to locate Kong Fang's secret entrance, and have 3 turns left to defend it. "Hey! They got a giant animated bronze statue of doom over here nice for them."

Professor Frankenbeans starts to make his way towards the secret entrance, on his way he managed to disintegrate a cultist and a Chinese henchman. Meanwhile, The Shadow managed to unearth some evil chanting pottery.....OF DOOOOOM. The evil chanting psyches out the characters causing anyone activating within 12" to take a Maxie test to be able to activate. This really slowed down Kong Fang and his animated bronze statue.......OF DOOOOOOOM.

I'm like the Annie Liebowitz of miniature photography...... No I'm just kidding, I'm like a retarded monkey with a broken Polaroid

Kong Fang's seductive daughter and her zombie minions enter the guard house ruins to head the elite characters off at the pass......meanwhile the US Red Rockets are outside....doing stuff.

I was certain this moment spelled the doom of Lobster Johnson and Professor Frankenbeans, somehow Lobster Johnson managed to strike down Kong Fang's daughter (I keep calling her that because I forget the character's name...let's call her Ding Dong). So anyway once Ding Dong was struck down all of Ding Dong's zombies collapsed.....Ding Dong.
So in summary, our game of Where Heroes Dare could have been called Where Heroes Achieve Mediocrity and Shame. Outside some of the Red Rockets managed to get up to the secret entrance but were immediately pinned so they could not contest the location. The "elite" heroes made it halfway across the guard house ruins, and managed to bag up a respectable body count while taking little damage themselves, but they just couldn't cover enough ground to help out.
The game was a ton of fun, there were good friends, and delicious pie. Life is good.

1 comment:

  1. You are too hard on yourself, you are more of a Mablethorpe of miniature photography.
    I think some of my favorite moments were the Professor Frankenbean's Death Ray blasts to the Cult of Al. "The ruined fort house of the Great Wall screamed like an abattoir's from the Shadow's twin .45's."